Shakespearian Crossover

This sounds like a conversation I would have with my mom.

LONGAVILLE: I beseech you, a word: what is she in the white?
BOYET: A woman sometimes, an' you saw her in the light.
LONGAVILLE: Perchance light in the light. I desire her name.
BOYET: She hath but one for herself; to desire that were a shame.
LONGAVILLE: Pray you, sir, whose daughter?
BOYET: Her mother's, I have heard.
LONGAVILLE: God's blessing on your beard!

"God's blessing on your beard" must be the Shakespearian equivalent of, "And whose car do you drive? Do you want it taken away?"

The thing that is shocking about these few lines is how literal they are. Indeed, Shakespeare is known for his figurative language. So the reason this contrast works so well, is because we have been primed to wait for such figurative speech.

That's what Allen Iverson said about his crossover. How does it happen that he always breaks ankles when he drives to the basket? It's a phenomenon sports analysts studied, until they came out with a study that I can't find for the life of me, but it works like a charm.

In the first half, Iverson would fake one way. He has a great crossover, so you have to really get a jump on it to stop him. He would go right to left and he'd get you. He'd go right to left and he'd just barely get you. He'd go right to left and you'd be inches away.

And then he'd start right, fake left and go right. You were ready this time. You were jumping to his left. You were going to stuff him. But he went the other way. And your ankles were broken.

See if people are jumping the gun a little bit in these clips, and you'll see why Shakespeare speaking literally seems so sharp. Watch the first clip - Jordan wants Iverson to go to his left (Jordan's right) and he jumps that way in anticipation... twice. Pay attention to how the defenders are jumping before Iverson is crossing over.